Absolut Wendy.

Doesn't this photo make you want to take a couple of shots of icy cold vodka? But I'm going to let you in on a little secret: I hate vodka! (Traumatizing college story from my days at BFU. Far too horrifying to share here.)

Clearly, I am a very talented promoter. On the outside, I'm all: "Yay vodka! Let's drink vodka all weekend and wear halter tops! Woo hoo!" But on the inside, I'm crying and trying my damnest to not throw up.

I should be a model. My skills are being wasted at the law firm. I just need an agent and a make-up artist.